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Essential oils, and WD-40, can fix just about anything that’s wrong

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“Essential oils” come in various types of bottles and cans.

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By Mark Rutledge

Saturday, October 13, 2018

For anyone not yet immersed in the world of essential oils, a house party is trying to find you.

Women used to attend house parties to learn about, buy and sell Tupperware. Today, similar parties focus on the medicinal values associated with essential oils. Before my wife went to one of those parties, I assumed the most essential oils on the planet were motor oil and WD-40. I was mistaken.

Since I have not attended an essential oil party, I had to consult Wikipedia to accurately define just what it is I’m writing about. It’s a concentrated, hydrophobic liquid that contains “volatile aroma compounds from plants.”

I’m still not clear on how they extract these oils, but they send them out in little glass bottles similar to those used for model paint. Coincidentally, some of the essential oils that my wife uses smell a lot like model paint.

Unlike paint, however, essential oils apparently can cure, or at least ease the symptoms of, just about anything that is unpleasant for humans and their domestic animals. Sharon rubs a mint-based essential oil on her belly to aid digestion. I don’t see how putting oil on your skin can prevent heartburn, but my wife insists that it does.

She adds essential oils to lotions and body creams, and she has diluted and loaded them into spray bottles to both clean kitchen appliances and control fleas on our pets.

Sharon paints essential oils on our dog, Max, in an effort to remove a nasty wart on his back. If it works, Max won’t know. He’s never even seen the wart.

My mother had a giant medical encyclopedia that she consulted for diagnosing an ailment and finding the best treatment. We still sometimes call her Doctor Granny.

My wife turns to the internet to find the best essential oil mixture. No problem is too large or too small for essential oils.

Just type the words “essential oil for” into a search engine and see what comes up. For example, I have a ganglion cyst that has been part of my right wrist for more than 20 years. It’s not the kind you can hit with a Bible to make it go away. Other than making my wrist bone look like it’s about to poke through the skin, the cyst does not hurt or bother me. So I leave it alone.

Sharon took a chance the other night and, sure enough, there is an essential oil treatment to make ganglion cysts go away. So far, it’s just making my wrist smell like really strong perfume just before bed.

Before these essential oils came along, I was certain that WD-40 was the most versatile, if not essential, oil. It really is the duct tape of petroleum products. I recently learned that WD-40 can clear up the fogged plastic over a car’s headlights.

I tried it on a faded plastic bumper and it did a better job and lasted longer than a product I had purchased for the job.

Some people think WD-40 can ease joint pain. I would never recommend using it for that purpose, but it brings to mind an interesting thought.

What if someone somewhere is filling all those little essential oil bottles with WD-40 and topping them off with whatever concentrated smelly stuff that’s on the label?

Essentially speaking, that would be funny.

Contact Mark Rutledge at mrutledge@reflector.com or like him on Facebook at Mark Rutledge Columns.

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