Loading...
BYH to the person responding re the voter ID question. Thanks for your example. I think that everyone should have the...

Regardless of diagnosis, children need discipline

JohnRosemondGDR_177.jpg

John Rosemond

Loading…

John Rosemond

Sunday, June 3, 2018

Q I am a grandmother with custody of my two grandsons, 6-year-old twins. Because of behavior problems at home and school and difficulties relating to other children (they play and communicate with one another just fine), they have been diagnosed with autism. What is your opinion of the diagnosis and what can I do to help them? Their therapist has told me that usual means of discipline won’t work but has yet to give me something that does.

A As opposed to a verifiable physical disease such as cancer, all psychiatric (mental health) diagnoses, including autism — or, more accurately, autism spectrum disorder (ASD) — are based not on "hard" data but on third-party description. As such, a diagnosis of ASD is a construct and subject, therefore, to unreliability. One psychologist may render a diagnosis of autism while another may render, for the same child, a diagnosis of, say, childhood bipolar disorder or oppositional defiant disorder.

There are several theories concerning autism that attribute its origin to genetics and other biological factors, but none of them have been proven conclusively. The dispute, mind you, is not over what people are reporting — behavior — but speculative notions regarding etiology, or cause.

For the above reasons, I don't pay much attention to diagnosis. In the first place, in today’s health care environment, insurance providers require that mental health professionals assign one or more diagnostic labels to anyone they see. A psychologist won’t get reimbursed if he tells an insurance company that he is counseling so-and-so because of “problems in relationships.” Reimbursement depends on the psychologist diagnosing so-and-so with a recognized mental illness like depression.

It is not uncommon for twins during early childhood to develop a “secret language” which they only use to communicate with one another. The phenomenon, estimated to occur with nearly half of all twins (including fraternal), is called cryptophasia. With or without cryptophasia, however, idiosyncratic, twin-to-twin behaviors can also develop that may ultimately interfere with normal peer relationships during early and middle childhood. In most cases, these difficulties are eventually “outgrown,” but this phenomenon should be taken into account when evaluating young twins who are having difficulty socializing with other children.

If my hunch is correct, then what people are seeing may not be autism (suspending for the moment any question concerning the validity and reliability of the diagnosis). Regardless, the notion that “normal means of discipline don’t work with autistic children” is pure balderdash. That says more about the person making that claim than it does your boys. I’ve worked with a good number of parents of children diagnosed with ASD. These kids are not a different species; they are human. As such, the same principles that govern the successful discipline of any human child, applied properly, will work.

What does not work with ASD kids is acting like the diagnosis requires that they be handled with kid gloves. The proper discipline of a child, diagnosis or not, requires adults who are ready to step up to the plate and deliver unequivocal authority.

Kid gloves just won’t do.

Contact family psychologist John Rosemond at his websites, www.johnrosemond.com or www.parentguru.com.

Loading…

Humans of Greenville

@HumansofGville

Local photographer Joe Pellegrino explores Greenville to create a photographic census of its people.

Look

June 20, 2018

Q: Do you have suggestions for a diet to prevent calcium oxalate kidney stones? I have been getting conflicting information. — E.L., Greenville

A: I am pleased that Kara Massotti will answer your question. Kara returns to Greenville from her dietetic internship and master’s in nutrition…

June 20, 2018

Q I am afraid I may be a controlling mom of my young adult daughter, but we have a dynamic in which she seeks me out often, solicits my advice, and makes me too important in her life. I admit to offering that advice because it is hard for me to draw a line between healthy support and presence, and…

Carolyn Hax

June 20, 2018

When it's too hot to cook, try serving a big summery salad for your main meal. Not just a simple garden salad, but a satisfying bowl layered with crisp veggies, grains or legumes and fresh herbs. The combination is fresh, filling and light — guaranteed to hit the spot on a warm day.

This…

062018tastefood

June 18, 2018

Bug Hunt

River Park North, 1000 Mumford Road, will host Bug Hunt from 10-11:30 a.m. Saturday. Participants will take a 1.5-mile hike to search for insects. Cost is $3 for city residents and $5 for others. Call 329-4560.

Summer reading

Sheppard Memorial Library, 530 Evans St., and its branches will…

June 18, 2018

D.H. Conley High School has announced the following scholarship awards:

Tia Adkins – Greenville Pitt Educational Association

Jackson Allsbrook – St. James United Methodist Church Scholarship

Michael Arce – Pitt Community College Visions Scholarship

Nick Baldwin – East…

June 17, 2018

I recently sampled from the menus of 10 restaurants in Jacksonville, Snead’s Ferry and Swansboro, leaving the choice of dishes to the chefs and owners.

Not surprisingly, I was served shrimp and grits at eight of the 10 — at breakfast, lunch and dinner.

This has become a recurring theme…

Bob Garner

June 17, 2018

Q Our 15-year-old daughter has told us she’s in love with a 20-year-old guy who is in the Army and intending to make the Army his career. We’ve met him, and he is extremely respectful and well-mannered, and has told us he’s in love with her. We’ve made it clear to both of…

JohnRosemondGDR_177.jpg

June 17, 2018

Q Three of us ladies planned a trip to New York for two nights to see shows. We reserved a hotel room to share among us. Train and theater tickets were purchased ahead of time.

Several days before our planned departure, one person backed out because a relative was near death, and she needed to fly…

Carolyn Hax

June 17, 2018

FARMVILLE — Steve and Amber Dunn did not have a chance to hear their daughter’s first words. They never got to sit next to her crib at night and watch her sleep.

Mae was practically a teenager before they ever even heard her voice, a middle-schooler before she spent a single night…

061718fathersdayadopt-2.jpg

June 17, 2018

HABITS AND PRACTICES

Dear Short Answers: My soon-to-be wife converted to Catholicism when she married her second husband and he insisted that they raise their children in the Catholic church. Now that we are getting married, she is insisting that I convert. Since we are much too old to have…

Short Answers
320 stories in Look. Viewing 1 through 10.
«First Page   «Previous Page        
Page 1 of 32
        Next Page»   Last Page»