Sitting down for a few moments and “doing nothing” is not easy for most women. Married or single, a woman is either doing something or thinking about something she should be doing. And she can’t sit still until it’s done. Which means never. Because we all know that a woman’s work is never done!

Women spend almost every minute of every day cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, planning meals, shopping for groceries, washing dishes or loading/unloading the dishwasher, taking care of pets and/or kids, dropping the kids off and picking them up, from school, from soccer practice, Little League, gym, day care, piano lessons and the mall, taking them to doctor and dental appointments, supervising homework, meeting with teachers, and if that’s not enough, perhaps working outside the home. Sound familiar? I feel tired just thinking about it

In case you think a single woman’s life is any easier, think again. Even if a woman has no children or mate to look after, her life can be just as busy and hectic. She still has the same household chores to do, maybe a pet that demands attention, and additional responsibilities such as keeping the car maintained, taking out the trash, raking leaves, shoveling snow … And a single woman has no one to share the burden of all those mundane tasks when she feels overworked, unwell or otherwise out of sorts.

Sometimes I have to remind myself to sit down and do nothing. I have to remind myself that it’s OK. Because those brief respites in between shopping, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry and working help me to relax, recharge, refresh. During those tranquil moments I can turn off the chatter in my mind and rest my body.

My favorite place to “do nothing” — when weather permits — is my little patio. On weekends, I often get up early and sit outside with a cup of coffee, listen to the morning songbirds, read, write in my journal or look through travel magazines, dreaming of faraway cities and countries I hope to visit some day.

In the evening, I’ll relax with a glass of wine on the patio and watch the ruby-throated hummingbirds dart from their nest in the tall trees to the feeder in my flower garden. As the sun begins to set, cicadas start their deafening chorus, noisy swallows circle overhead and my thoughts sail away. Occasionally I drift into a peaceful slumber.

Of course, in late fall and winter it is impossible to linger on the patio. So I curl up on my comfy, white love seat with a cup of coffee or glass of wine and read, while I listen to my favorite CDs. Sometimes on a chilly evening I make a fire in my log-burning fireplace.

No one can tell you where to find your quiet place or when to take a break from the daily grind. The important thing is to do it, especially during this holiday season when life becomes even more demanding and stressful. A woman’s work may be never done, but in between the rush — and often juggle — to get things done, we can at least reward ourselves with a few moments of “doing nothing.” After a busy day, we deserve it!

Rosie Erskine Lamrhari, 60, is a teacher, traveler, writer and reader. She earned a master’s degree in English Education from East Carolina University in 1997 and has been teaching English as a Second Language ever since. Though a Hoosier by birth, Rosie considers herself a Tar Heel by choice and will always call North Carolina home.