- The happiest boaters are always glad to chip in for gas
- Nothing fuels a burning hard drive like cherished e-mails
- Single Parenting harder than fourth-grade math
- The warmest seat in the library is the most quiet
- He worked for the Lord, not liquor
- Home improvement hard to live with
- One good reason to let the kids stay up for 'American Idol'
- Spooky old antique bed beginning to wear out welcome
- Drafty old Tennessee farmhouses form icicles on the inside
- Modern TVs are easy to dust, but make terrible coffee tables
- When playing hide and seek, beware the cactus in the closet
- Nothing says Merry Christmas like 'no assembly required'
- It's hard to look on the bright side through broken sunglasses
- If Jerry Clower wasn't dead, he'd still be the funniest man alive
- She has her mother's eyes, and an ear for daddy's music